Begin with one dirty chimney. Let’s say the fireplace has not been cleaned for a couple of years. The soot lining the chimney flue is saturated with flammable stuff called creosote. It doesn’t take much to ignite creosote, a newspaper fire sending flames up to the damper is enough. Once kindled, creosote burns with joyous abandon; in a matter of seconds the fire spreads up the flue creating a draft that only helps things along. At this point your average chimney fire begins to roar and howl, sending the occupants of the house running for cover. If you run, you’ll be treated to a real fireworks show as the creosote fire builds in intensifies, fire balls shit out of the chimney and onto the roof. If you are lucky, the chimney will fall apart destroying one end of the building; if you’re not, this miniature volcano can bring the whole house down. However, if you stand your ground a chimney fire can be controlled. Throw rock salt on the floor of the fireplace; close the glass doors; call the fire department and hope for the best. But it should be pointed out that having your chimney cleaned is a lot easier on your nerves than the rock salt and glass door method.

-John Downing, Founder